Wilmington is 50 miles (or about 80km) away from where I live. Probably 15 miles closer from the bookstore. I buy most of my really 'fancy' foods from The Fresh Market.
Just before I left the meeting, my friend Kristyn informed me that they had just opened a new Harris Teeter store at about half that distance two weeks ago.
"They sell HP sauce and Marmite. You might want to try there first," she said.
Harris Teeter is a sort of specialty grocery store. Thank goodness she told me, because H. Teets (that's what I'm calling it now) had every single British food item on my list. Saved me time and gas money.
More importantly, gas money.

I picked up all sorts of awesomeness!
Branston Pickle?
Check.

I'd never tried B.P. before, I bought it based on all your recommendations. It's amazing!
Marmite?
Check.

They say you either love Marmite, or you hate it. I don't understand the hate part.
It's effing delicious. I wanna motorboat it.
And it's 100% vegetarian!
(*cough* Like I give a rat's ass about that *cough*)
I couldn't wait till Friday, I had to bust that one open. Butter...Marmite...toast...heaven.
Heinz 57 Beans?
Check.

Heinz 57 Curry Beans?
Oh, pardon me. I meant Beanz.
Check. Mate.

Cream for my (to be freshly baked) scones?
That's a check and a hells yes!

English jam for my scones?
Check.

Ok...it's Scottish jam. They didn't have English jam.
But isn't Scotland just sort of an annex of England?

Hey, hey! I was just kidding. No need to pelt me with haggis, my Scottish friends.
What's that? Haggis Hurling is a sport?
Oh. Well carry on then.
And thank you for the jam.
HP Sauce?

Hm. Don't know if that's quite a 'check'. I prefer the Original, but all they had was Fruity.
What do they do, put extra tamarind in it?
Oh well, I'm good with Fruity.
Hey, you know what? If you say Fruity a bunch of times, it starts to not sound like a word anymore.
Fruity, fruity, fruity....
Getting off track here.
Wensleydale cheese?
Check.

They had two other kinds...one with apricot bits and another with cranberry bits.
But since I got the Fruity HP, I stayed with regular Wensleydale. Otherwise that's just too much fucking fruit.
Aero?

That not only deserves a 'check', but an 'I didn't know Aero was English'. I always thought it was a Canadian thing. Huh.
Jammie Dodgers?
(Notice, they're "Now More Fruity!" Wtf? Does that make everything better in England??)
A 'check' for me...

...and the forks for IG.

If loving biscuits that you think taste like ass is wrong, then I don't wanna be right.
Hmm...my fingernails sure are dirty. Can take the gardener out of the dirt, but can't take the dirt out of the gardener.
And last but not least...
Drum roll please!

I didn't think I'd find actual Jaffa Cakes. I thought I'd have to settle for Pims!
Obviously I didn't buy it all to eat for the Royal Wedding, or it'd probably kill me.
"Kyna's dead."
"Oh, that's terrible! How'd she die?"
"I heard they found her on the floor with curried bean sauce smeared all over her face and a Jammie Dodger lodged in her aorta."
"Tsk, tsk. She should have paced herself..."
Harris Teeter, I love you.