Monday, March 19, 2012

Blah, Blah, Blah, Work, Blah, Blah

One of the last times I posted, I mentioned that I couldn't or shouldn't talk about work.

Well, fuck it.

Because that's where all my best stories are from in the last couple of weeks.

I can always go back and delete this, right?


Anyway, let's start with something fun and positive.

A couple of weeks ago, we had a huge event to commemorate Dr. Seuss' birthday at the store.

We had face painting, games, cupcake decorating, storytelling all day long.

Hundreds and hundreds of kids everywhere.

Knowing me, do you think I was happy or pissed off about this?

I bet you guessed wrong, bitches!!

I got to paint my face and wear an awesome hat all day long.

Who wouldn't be jazzed about that??

And it was really fun seeing all the kids so excited. One of our employees dressed in a Cat in the Hat costume and went around all day entertaining the masses.

She was a real sport about it too, because those costumes are fucking sweltering. At one point she was taking a break in the back room and I thought she was literally going to pass out from heat exhaustion. Sometimes I'm really glad that I'm too fat to get into those things.

The day was really fun, but by the end of my shift, customers were starting to get pissy.

The regulars were pissy because they couldn't get to anything and it was really loud and crowded in there. And the people that came just for the even got pissy because their kids were getting pissy.

So I was happy to leave by 3pm, and leave everyone to be pissy.

I stopped to pick up sandwiches from Subway on the way home, and there was no way I was taking off that hat after wearing it all day. My hair was a tangled, sweaty beehive-looking nest under that thing.

A hot dude in line was actually hitting on me while I had cat makeup and that hat on. It was the crowning achievement of my life, really.

The rest of the last couple of weeks...meh, not as fun.

I've been sick as shit in the last week. Felt like there's been a family of angry squirrels living in my lungs.  I'm finally doing a little bit better. I'm never sick, so when I am it really hits me.

And speaking of shit...

Someone actually took one in the hallway to the bathrooms/break room at work the other day.






I'm sure it was a little kid. Well, I'm actually hoping it was a little kid, 'cause yikes.

Usually I'm the one that gets screwed over and has to deal with things like that, but thank the sweet Baby Jesus in the manger that I wasn't there that morning. My friend Sean had to clean it up.

If the kid was young enough to have pooped in the hallway, don't you think a parent would have been nearby? And seen this? And you know, perhaps cleaned it up??

Yeah. People are fucking awesome.

And speaking of awesome people...

There have been a lot of angry-ass bible customers this last week.

Thrice (yep, I said thrice) I've had people angry over the price of bibles.

People always say, 'It's in the bible.'

They're full of shit, because there are zillions upon kajillions of bibles. Different translations, different styles, different uses.

Gift bibles, travel bibles, study bibles, parallel bibles...(I'm starting to sound like Bubba from 'Forrest Gump' here)

Some are really expensive, some are really cheap.

People never want the $10 bible. They want the $85 bible. But they want us to sell it to them for $10.

One woman in particular got all up in my face.

Customer: Excuse me. I need a King James Version bible for my kid.

Me: Well, we only have one in the store. There aren't many KJV bibles made for children in general. It's a hard translation for them to understand.

Customer: She needs it for school. How much is it?

Me; $30

*customer's eyes bug out of her head*

Customer: For a bible?? That's ridiculous. I'm not paying $30.

Me: Well, that's the price. We don't set the prices, the publishers do.

Customer: She needs it for school.

Me: Well, this is the only one we have. And it's $30.

Customer: That's crazy! Considering GOD was the publisher in the first place!


She actually said that.

I had no idea that God was in the printing business. Is it in the bible? Maybe you can take up high bible prices with Him, Lady.

Oh, and let him know how awesome you were treating me, He'll love that.

Three different ones like that. Yesterday was the latest know. On Sunday. When this person had ovbiously just come straight from church to the store.

I wonder what it is about the drive over that makes them forget everything they just learned at church?

I don't attend church, I never have. Yet I always treat others well, as I'd like to be treated.

Funny how that is, eh?

Anyway, the weather is starting to get really gorgeous here. That's definitely a plus.

Hopefully it'll start cheering people up. It's definitely cheering ME up.

Oh, and I got a faaaaaaaabulous new pair of Converse,

Talk about cheered up!!

Tuesday, March 6, 2012

Chuck's Annual Oncologist Appointment


Thought you might like to know :)

Thursday, March 1, 2012

Is It Really March Already?


Where is the fucking time going?

So, as Cal pointed out to me the other day, I haven't been writing on here as much lately.

I started a second blog on tumblr, and I spend a lot of time playing on it.

It's something that's quick, easy, and I don't have to think much about what I'm writing, like I do on here. Plus, I get to hang out with a bunch of girls that are just as Cumberaddicted as I am :)

And the reason that's so attractive to me right now, is because I've had a lot on my mind. I like the mindless escape of Tumblr (which they should really call Crackblr).

I don't like to talk about unpleasant things on here. No one likes a downer.

Lots of stuff going on work that I don't want to blog about. Or really shouldn't blog about. So that's out for discussion.

And the rest is mundane. And I've been a little sad.

Maybe I'm attracted to Tumblr because of the amount of followers I have over there. I AM an attention-whore in case you haven't noticed. :)

I've had it for a month and a half, and I just passed 800 followers. Which blows my mind. I feel like a cult leader.

The average age range of users over there is pretty young. Lots of teenage girls. I've made good friends with a few of the 'older' folk on there (older meaning 25-30).

The teenage girls are lovely, they're just excited fangirls, like me. Which is AWESOME.

But they make me sad sometimes.

So many of them feel so bad about themselves. Talk about how depressed they are. How ugly they are. How they're not skinny enough. Or pretty enough. How they just want to kill themselves. Or they talk about cutting themselves.

It doesn't happen all the time, or I wouldn't be on there. It'd be too sad. But once in awhile I'll see a post roll through my dashboard that contains those things.

I wish I could just hug all of them and tell them to be more confident and love themselves for who and what they are.

But I also remember what I felt like when I was that age. I felt the same, went through the same things, had the same thoughts. Confidence in who you are only comes with time. I'm glad it only took me till my mid-20's to not give a shit about what others think of me and be happy with myself.

I feel like I'm making a little bit of a difference though. I've received some lovely compliments to the tune of  'You make me feel like I can say what I'm thinking, because you say whatever you're thinking!' and the like.

That makes my heart happy.

I've also been doing a lot of fiction-writing the last couple of months. Nothing anyone on here would want to read, it's 'just' fanfiction (and gay fanfiction at that). But I love it. The story I'm working on is the longest thing I've ever written, and it's still going. And I'm proud of it. I've had over 3000 hits on it, and 150 people left me notes about how much they loved it. It may not be 'real' writing, but it makes me happy and gives me an outlet for creativity. Even if it's just for a select demographic.

Anyway, I hope something awesome happens to me every couple of days from here on out, so that I can write a little more often on here.

Thanks Cal, for reminding me that it's not the number of followers I have, it's the quality of the readers :) Everyone that regularly leaves me a comment on here is my friend. :)

Love you guys!