Monday, March 15, 2010

La Cucaracha, La Cucaracha!

I have a love/hate relationship with Spring.

Mostly Spring and I get along well. But sometimes we fight, and then Spring has to call cops on me, and get a restraining order. But then the next week, Spring and I make up and we're all lovey-dovey again. Our friends don't know what to think!

Spring brings flowers, hummingbirds, baseball games, and men chasing women in short shorts.

What else does it bring?

Effing bugs.

Two of my least favourite are in that picture. The large one is a cockroach (in case you haven't seen one). The other one is an earwig. It's fitting that these two nasty creatures kicked the bucket side by side. I'd love to say that I'm creepy enough to have posed them that way, but I didn't :)

Yesterday afternoon, I watched that cockroach writhe around on its back for a long time, trying to turn over. It finally got itself back on its feet. Then what does it do? It climbs up the screen, and promptly flips itself over on its back again. I figured a creature that stupid deserved to go through the process of natural selection.

Actually, I shouldn't say that. I just remembered the time that I was walking up an incline in my parking garage at the University of Alberta. I was carrying an extremely heavy backpack full of textbooks. I lost my balance (which happens a lot, I'm a spaz), and I fell on my back like an upside down turtle. I had to rock back and forth a few times to get back up again. I wonder if University Security used camera footage of that at their Christmas party? LOL

I have a bigger problem with the earwigs. It's very hard to get rid of them. They stay deep in the ground, so that poison can't get to them. They come up out of the drains, cracks in the door...I always see them crawling across the kitchen and bathroom floors.

BLEAH! I'm gettin' the Willies just thinking about it.

On top of everything, we haven't had the Bug Guy come in a really long time. We used to have one come in and spray the inside and the outside perimeter of the house every month, to make sure we didn't have any problems. I never had heard of this living in the North, but down here in the Southern US, it's definitely needed.

Only problem is that my husband is now boycotting them. Mr. A is a bigger musicphile than I am. Way bigger. Like Godzilla big.

The owner of the company we used came by to do our spraying one time. Many of his workers had quit at once, and there wasn't anyone else that could come and do it. Should have been a red flag, huh?

Mr. A has a picture of Jimmy Page from Led Zeppelin hanging over our couch. He points it out to every new person that happens to walk into the living room. We have to take all our pictures in front of it, so that Jimmy feels like part of the family. Christmas pictures? Jimmy's in them.

Pictures of Mr. A's stepson & grandson? In front of Jimmy.

Those two pictures are from different Christmases, by the way. Think it's a coincedence that the tree is next to Jimmy? We'll never know....

Anyway, Mr. A was having a conversation about Led Zeppelin with the Bug Guy Owner, whose name is also Jimmy. Jimmy Bug Guy expressed enthusiasm for Mr. A's bootlegs. Mr. A lent him said bootlegs. Haven't seen Jimmy Bug Guy since.

Mr. A's called and harassed them to get his CDs back. No dice. Hence, The Boycott.

I agree with the boycott, because I think that guy did him wrong. People like that are the reason why I never lend anything of mine out. However, Mr. A still hasn't found us a replacement exterminator.

And now we're set to be the new Roach Motel in town.

On my walk through the yard today, I did find some nicer bugs :)

My rosemary shrub was full of ladybugs. And the anole lizards were also out in the remnants of my toad lilies. Can you spot him? :)


Liza said...

Oh cute! It took me a minute, but I did spot him!

Jayne said...

Ewww BUGS!! I hate 'em! I have to say though, I'm lucky enough to live with seven furry feline assassins who will dismember and torture any hapless bug that happens to crawl under our door.

It sucks that Jimmy Bug Guy didn't return the bootlegs.

Anna said...

The very word c********h makes me go all of a quiver so I skimmed though this post until I saw those beautiful ladybirds :)

GardenJoy4Me said...

Kyna girl .. OMG ! I laughed so much at this post ;-)
It was like reading a short story with Stephen King at the helm and not knowing how this was going to turn out !!!
I hate earwigs with a passion too .. and thankfully, so far, roaches don't like the Great White North still .. phew !
I'm sure they will find a way though .. determined little BUGGERS that they are ? haha
I don't blame Mr. A for being so pissed at bug guy .. I think the bug guy should have a truck load of "bugs" dumped on HIM ! ;-)
Great story .. still laughing over here girl !

Catherine@AGardenerinProgress said...

I love how the story came full circle back to the bugs. I still haven't forgiven the guy I lent a Ministry album (yes album) to in the 80's and never got it back. I never lent music to anyone again after that.

Noelle said...

I'll stick with the ladybugs. Living in the south, we get our home sprayed every month which helps with the black widows...

Shyrlene said...

Kyna - unfortunately those nasty bugs are why I couldn't live down south (big wuss here!). I always say, I want to know those little buggers are going to die a cold hard frozen death . BTW - if Mr.A needs some add'l muscle, I can send my son down your way. He may be only 19 (and 6'2"), but NOBODY messes with "Jimmy" and Zeppelin! (we share love of "Classic Rock" - but that's another story!). -Shyrlene

Lucy said...

Earwigs and cockroaches are set to inherit the earth.


The Idiot Gardener said...

I've found that by having a passion for Clawhammer Banjo music, no-one ever wants to borrow it!

As for cockroaches, it's too cold here for them. Last time I visited my dentist (he's a Mexican, of that I'm sure, but he pretends to be Indian) I tried to trick him by suddenly saying "La Cucaracha!" He didn't respond. They train them well, these Mexican dentists.

Kimberly said...

Admittedly, I don't like bugs. I'm really not that girly about too many things but the c.r. is one that makes me ill. Spiders too, although they're not dirty and gross...their eight eye thing creeps me out. Anyway, the ladybugs are nice. And the thought of you toppling over from your backpack is too good to stop thinking about!! My last thought...Jimmy Bug Guy sucks!

Kyna said...

Liza:They're cool little chameleons, blend in really easily :D

Jayne:Must be nice to be bug free without having to pay anybody :D

Anna: Sorry you had to skim so much ;) Glad I redeemed myself lol

Joy: I'm glad you enjoyed it so much...I do sort of tend to go to 'short story length' sometimes LOL

Catherine: I'm with you on that! My husband's 'lost' so many albums lending him out to people. When we're listening to something on the radio, he always says 'I used to have that album, I don't know what happened to it...'

Noelle: Bleah, black widows! I haven't seen too many of those. Except two years ago...we had the bug guy come by, and they dropped out of the siding all around the perimeter of our house. They came crawling up onto the porch....never happened like that any other time O_O. And we had one living in our mailbox for awhile, unbeknownst to us...until Mr A stuck his hand way back into the box and got a fistful of nasty web O_O

Shyrlene: Well, my husband's 48 years old and 5'7", but he's pretty ornery! LOL Glad to see you enjoy classic rock as well!

Lucy: Thanks for that optimistic comment LOL :P

IG: I think I'd stop listening to music completely if I had to resort to that lol. A Mexican who pretends to be Indian eh? My dentist just pretends to be a good dentist. It's all a sham.

Kimberly: I'm glad you got a laugh out of my predicament, that's what I'm here for. Embarassing or stupid things that I've done seem less embarassing/stupid when I put it into a story to entertain others :)

Bush Chick said...

Oh I don't mind bugs. I figure they are here for a reason - maybe like Lucy said they are going to inherit the earth. Mostly I just catch them and put them outside. That anole lizard is weird in and interesting kind of way.

The Garden Ms. S said...

"and I fell on my back like an upside down turtle"

lol! I just pictured you in the Windsor park parkade. Damn, why do students have to carry so many books!

Kyna said...

Haha, Windsor WAS my parkade! :DI also fell down the stairs in it once, and almost ripped one of my arms off trying not to get injured too badly...:P